Death of a spouse and dating

— Sometime after the death of your spouse, you will begin to think about dating, especially if you liked being married. But whenever you start, you’ll probably feel guilty, like you’re cheating on your wife or husband. Women typically aren’t in a hurry because they have a larger circle of friends for sharing their grief. Don’t expect them to know what foods you like or to get your jokes.

Even if your spouse said that she wanted you to date again, you will feel odd about it in the beginning. You are going to have to tell them who you are, and you are going to have to share your feelings.

You can go out with someone without calling it a date, and without any thoughts of it being romantic or leading to marriage. Sparks are fun, but you may need social time more than romance. Do you want to move to a different part of the country? You have the opportunity to figure these things out and try new ideas. Maybe you’ll prefer to live alone for a time and see other people only socially. You will know you are feeling better when there are more good days than bad.Sometimes, people hesitate to bring up the loss or mention the dead person's name because they worry this can be hurtful.These groups can be specialized—parents who have lost children or people who have lost spouses, for example—or they can be for anyone learning to manage grief.Check with religious groups, local hospitals, nursing homes, funeral homes, or your doctor to find support groups in your area.

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